You make an interesting point. Yes, definitely with Whites. When I wrote that in was in reference to cross-racial friendships (from my book), so I was referencing with your friend of color. However, I really like what you have said and believe it to be effective in this current reality, especially because we have such uneven experiences about race.

Yet, BIPOC do have lived experience but not every BIPOC knows the history and psychology behind the dynamics of racism or understand racial identity development and resolution process. Nor are we a monolithic race, just as Whites are not. As a result, BIPOC are not always the arbitrators of facts (always of their truth but not necessarily of facts…if that makes sense?) which is why I think there needs to be some bi-directional learning. We all have work to do when it comes to achieving racial equity…different work, but none-the-less we all have work. Your comment has given me something to think about. I will noodle it a bit. Thanks so much for your insights!